Hiking

Hiking. Why.

OK, so I went out for a hike on Sunday and I was prepared to go and conquer "the mountain". Now, first of all, what the hell was I thinking after a night of lemon drop shots and red bull vodkas, washed down with Jack in the Box at 3am? I wake up one morning and I am a spelunker? I blame you Kat, if you are reading this. Always motivating me to do "active", "adventurous" things. You know I am just not built for that sort of thing. Regardless...

So we start climbing, I'm feeling good. Fresh air. Random wildlife [and let me clarify, this is in Pasadena, so like lizards, birds, and large beetles about do it]. Then it gets hot. Like, really fucking hot. So I drink water. and I'm still climbling. And while I can see the bottom, and yes, its really pretty and like, small looking, I still can't see the top.

This goes on for two hours.

One member of our fearless party starts to fall behind, bless her soul. So while some are pressing onward, we still can't see the top, the sun is setting, we are a man down, and I am beginning to think the mountain is roughly the height of infinity. At the same time, Lance Armstrong and company are like, pushing past us on their mountain bikes at a stupidly incomprehensible speed and North-Face outfitted senior citizens are passing us on their way back down from the top.

The top, which we didn't make it to.

We asked one of these intrepid geriatrics exactly how much further up it was, to which we were informed, "well, its about another half hour to the 2.7 mile mark [fyi, NOT the top] so if you don't have any more water I'd say that's something to consider." Oh, the smug look on his face as he brushed past us. Yes, I get it. You are old and in better shape at 60 than I am at 25.

So today, I am sore (is it really a good sore?) and still tired, and I don't even have triumphant photos to show for it. So in conclusion, hiking: would I go again? Perhaps. But not unless I know I can get to the top, and if that means I have to start by climbing up something a little less ambitious like to the top of the parking structure at the Arclight then so be it.

Senior citizens be damned.